Thursday, September 27, 2012

Reflecting

We homeschooled our first “official” year last year.  I was so stressed and filled with worry.  Worry that I wasn’t doing something “right”.  Stressed about getting it all done.  I would constantly go to my husband who is my sounding board to vent my worry and tell him how I was doing it all wrong.  Being the veteran teacher that he was he would assure me that I was doing alright and “that every teacher” has faced those same fears, doubts, worries and stress. 

I have learned to trust the Lord.  I have also learned to believe in myself that I can do this.  I know that right now at this time this is where the Lord has us.  I know that this is the best decision for our family.  I can rest in this decision.

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I have learned that “my plan” for the day doesn’t always match what actually happens.  Some days start off rough and they keep going that direction.  I can make every one’s life completely miserable by forcing the kids form to my plan and get every last detail done that I had planned for that day.  By the way, this never ever works for us.  More often I find myself changing gears.  Putting that extra subject until tomorrow when we are all doing better.  I find that we all do better this way.  I also find that by the end of the week we get everything done that was planned for the week even if it didn’t follow my written plan to the letter.  I guess I am saying that I am learning not to sweat it and stress it and rather I am learning to be flexible. 

I see now that the Lord has changed my heart in helping me know that I can plan and “know what is up the road” but detours are okay.  I can rest even though the day doesn’t go according to plan.  I am very thankful for this in my life. 

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